Ephesians 4:29
Don't say unwholesome words
We know that we should avoid lying, gossipping, slandering, using angry words to manipulate. If we're still doing these things (as I know I and everybody else does at times) my advice is STOP IT. But we also have a practice of saying some very cutting and offensive words, that are presented in the form of a joke, and for which our intention is that they are not to be taken seriously. Again, I say STOP IT. These words can be misinterpreted, they can avoid expressing what we really mean, they can hide genuine feelings and they can communicate the wrong message to outsiders. If we want healthy relationships are words should not be unwholesome, whether meant or not, whether funny or not.
Say what is helpful for building others up
Words of confrontation are included in this category. To be helpful to others, these words need to be specific and grace filled. We also need to make sure we have adequate time to talk through the issues and that we are in a confidential space. Healthy relationships come from confrontation, as we commit to the other and help them grow in their self awareness.
Only say what is according to the needs of the other
To help us focus on what the other's needs are we listen to them, ask clarifying questions and in all circumstances show them grace.
Wow this really challenges to bring about change in the way we think and speak. I find it hardest to make changes that are subtle and everyday. Thank you for bringing this inspirational reading from Ephesians to my attention! The meaning is just as fresh and applicable to life now as it was when it was written.
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