Sunday, February 27, 2011
Fervent Prayer
At a worship ministry meeting yesterday, we talked about the power of prayer and the potential that God has to change our worship, ourselves, our church and our community as we surrender all to him in prayer. The video above reminds me of what can happen as we commit to God in prayer. What ideas does it give you?
Monday, February 14, 2011
Speaking words that benefit others
Ephesians 4:29
Don't say unwholesome words
We know that we should avoid lying, gossipping, slandering, using angry words to manipulate. If we're still doing these things (as I know I and everybody else does at times) my advice is STOP IT. But we also have a practice of saying some very cutting and offensive words, that are presented in the form of a joke, and for which our intention is that they are not to be taken seriously. Again, I say STOP IT. These words can be misinterpreted, they can avoid expressing what we really mean, they can hide genuine feelings and they can communicate the wrong message to outsiders. If we want healthy relationships are words should not be unwholesome, whether meant or not, whether funny or not.
Say what is helpful for building others up
Words of confrontation are included in this category. To be helpful to others, these words need to be specific and grace filled. We also need to make sure we have adequate time to talk through the issues and that we are in a confidential space. Healthy relationships come from confrontation, as we commit to the other and help them grow in their self awareness.
Only say what is according to the needs of the other
To help us focus on what the other's needs are we listen to them, ask clarifying questions and in all circumstances show them grace.
Don't say unwholesome words
We know that we should avoid lying, gossipping, slandering, using angry words to manipulate. If we're still doing these things (as I know I and everybody else does at times) my advice is STOP IT. But we also have a practice of saying some very cutting and offensive words, that are presented in the form of a joke, and for which our intention is that they are not to be taken seriously. Again, I say STOP IT. These words can be misinterpreted, they can avoid expressing what we really mean, they can hide genuine feelings and they can communicate the wrong message to outsiders. If we want healthy relationships are words should not be unwholesome, whether meant or not, whether funny or not.
Say what is helpful for building others up
Words of confrontation are included in this category. To be helpful to others, these words need to be specific and grace filled. We also need to make sure we have adequate time to talk through the issues and that we are in a confidential space. Healthy relationships come from confrontation, as we commit to the other and help them grow in their self awareness.
Only say what is according to the needs of the other
To help us focus on what the other's needs are we listen to them, ask clarifying questions and in all circumstances show them grace.
Friday, February 11, 2011
Minister's Desk
“The Lord God said, ‘It is not good for the man to be alone’” (Genesis 2:18).
When you read this do you sometimes think that God got it wrong? We come home after struggling with a work colleague who gets on our nerves. People are constantly demanding our time and attention. Extra Grace Required people wear us down and exhaust our supply of patience and tact. There are times when we feel that life would be better if we were alone. But unless we live on a deserted island, we are going to encounter others and our interpersonal relationships are going to be an important part of our daily existence. We live in a social world, one that can only be negotiated by communicating with, and relating with, other people. Our ability to do this in a healthy way is a reflection of both our inner self-understanding and self-awareness. This comes as we allow the Holy Spirit to do his ongoing work of transformation and growth in us.
At its very simplest level, an interpersonal relationship is a complex mix of two people who happen to be connected at a particular point in time. What grows out of this interpersonal merging depends not only on what is said, but on what isn’t said; not only on the choice of words, but on the choice of expressions; not only on what each person hears, but on what each person thinks he or she hears or wants to hear; not only on what actually happens, but on what each person expects to happen.
There is no such thing as a perfect interpersonal relationship, but there is such a thing as an improved one. That is why we name our core value Healthy Relationships. Using the adjective healthy reminds us that these are relationships that have the capacity to grow over time. It means that the people who make up the relationship are aware of the state of the relationship, are aware of the feelings, needs and condition of the other, and are self aware of their own feelings, needs and condition, and that they have the capacity to adapt and respond to the other.
Our relationships with others are largely what we make of them and what we want them to be. Most of us have more control over the course and destiny of our relationship than we may realise. The old idea that what it takes to have a good friend is to be one may seem trite, but both research and common sense tell us is that it is true. So my encouragement to each of us is to give attention and work toward bettering our relationships with each other. It doesn’t require that we become best friends with everybody else, but we can grow in our enjoyment and appreciation of others.
When you read this do you sometimes think that God got it wrong? We come home after struggling with a work colleague who gets on our nerves. People are constantly demanding our time and attention. Extra Grace Required people wear us down and exhaust our supply of patience and tact. There are times when we feel that life would be better if we were alone. But unless we live on a deserted island, we are going to encounter others and our interpersonal relationships are going to be an important part of our daily existence. We live in a social world, one that can only be negotiated by communicating with, and relating with, other people. Our ability to do this in a healthy way is a reflection of both our inner self-understanding and self-awareness. This comes as we allow the Holy Spirit to do his ongoing work of transformation and growth in us.
At its very simplest level, an interpersonal relationship is a complex mix of two people who happen to be connected at a particular point in time. What grows out of this interpersonal merging depends not only on what is said, but on what isn’t said; not only on the choice of words, but on the choice of expressions; not only on what each person hears, but on what each person thinks he or she hears or wants to hear; not only on what actually happens, but on what each person expects to happen.
There is no such thing as a perfect interpersonal relationship, but there is such a thing as an improved one. That is why we name our core value Healthy Relationships. Using the adjective healthy reminds us that these are relationships that have the capacity to grow over time. It means that the people who make up the relationship are aware of the state of the relationship, are aware of the feelings, needs and condition of the other, and are self aware of their own feelings, needs and condition, and that they have the capacity to adapt and respond to the other.
Our relationships with others are largely what we make of them and what we want them to be. Most of us have more control over the course and destiny of our relationship than we may realise. The old idea that what it takes to have a good friend is to be one may seem trite, but both research and common sense tell us is that it is true. So my encouragement to each of us is to give attention and work toward bettering our relationships with each other. It doesn’t require that we become best friends with everybody else, but we can grow in our enjoyment and appreciation of others.
Monday, February 7, 2011
Healthy Relationships - putting aside falsehoods and speaking truthfully
Ephesians 4:25
This week we begin a new four week series on healthy relationships. When we live with, and interact with others, relationships are inevitable. However, healthy relationships take time, effort and attention. Healthy relationships are worthwhile for our own sense of person hood and are an expression of the kingdom of God breaking through into this world. Recognising this we have identified Healthy Relationships as a Core Value of this congregation.
In his letter to the Ephesians Paul encourages them to "put off falsehood and speak truthfully." Throughout the Bible there is powerful emphasis on God's people speaking from a position of truth and honesty. In Psalm 15:1, 2 we read “Lord, we may dwell in your sanctuary? ...... Those...... who speak the truth from their hearts.” The foundation of healthy relationships is the ability for us to speak truthfully, without falsehood to others, God and ourselves. When our ability to speak truthfully is absent we conceal things from each other and ourselves and we put up false facades that mask who we are and what we’re really like. Through being open, genuine and speaking the truth about ourselves we are able to deeper our relationships with others and develop healthy/ier relationships.
But this does not mean that we should share every detail of our life with every person we meet. Healthy relationships require a healthy dose of guarded communication with those we don't know well, with those that are unable to cope with what we are sharing and those for whom it would be rude.
Though this is healthy, we need to be finding opportunities with those we know and trust and what to know better to push down our facades and reveal that which is hidden about ourselves. Sometimes this takes great courage and can result in our being hurt. But it is only through our willingness to place ourselves in a vulnerable position that our relationships with others will grow.
There is also the need to recognise that with a very few people, maybe two or three in our lifetimes, that we can be nearly totally open, revealing deep secrets and confessions about ourselves. Sharing to this level communicates how much we value these others in our lives and how important they are.
A challenge for all of us is to recognise when we are putting on a facade with another and to ask ourselves whether we need to do this. Or whether for the sake of healthy relationships we need to take the opportunity and pull down the facade and reveal a little more of ourselves. It is only by our taking the first step that others will respond and lead us into deeper intimacy with each other.
This week we begin a new four week series on healthy relationships. When we live with, and interact with others, relationships are inevitable. However, healthy relationships take time, effort and attention. Healthy relationships are worthwhile for our own sense of person hood and are an expression of the kingdom of God breaking through into this world. Recognising this we have identified Healthy Relationships as a Core Value of this congregation.
In his letter to the Ephesians Paul encourages them to "put off falsehood and speak truthfully." Throughout the Bible there is powerful emphasis on God's people speaking from a position of truth and honesty. In Psalm 15:1, 2 we read “Lord, we may dwell in your sanctuary? ...... Those...... who speak the truth from their hearts.” The foundation of healthy relationships is the ability for us to speak truthfully, without falsehood to others, God and ourselves. When our ability to speak truthfully is absent we conceal things from each other and ourselves and we put up false facades that mask who we are and what we’re really like. Through being open, genuine and speaking the truth about ourselves we are able to deeper our relationships with others and develop healthy/ier relationships.
But this does not mean that we should share every detail of our life with every person we meet. Healthy relationships require a healthy dose of guarded communication with those we don't know well, with those that are unable to cope with what we are sharing and those for whom it would be rude.
Though this is healthy, we need to be finding opportunities with those we know and trust and what to know better to push down our facades and reveal that which is hidden about ourselves. Sometimes this takes great courage and can result in our being hurt. But it is only through our willingness to place ourselves in a vulnerable position that our relationships with others will grow.
There is also the need to recognise that with a very few people, maybe two or three in our lifetimes, that we can be nearly totally open, revealing deep secrets and confessions about ourselves. Sharing to this level communicates how much we value these others in our lives and how important they are.
A challenge for all of us is to recognise when we are putting on a facade with another and to ask ourselves whether we need to do this. Or whether for the sake of healthy relationships we need to take the opportunity and pull down the facade and reveal a little more of ourselves. It is only by our taking the first step that others will respond and lead us into deeper intimacy with each other.
Saturday, December 11, 2010
The evil interlude
Esther 3:1 - 15
Evil is a part of every one of our lives and is a theme that goes right through the book of Esther. In this section, we see it rear its ugly head in a very real and evident way - the plot of Haman to eradicate the Jewish people. Whilst we might say that this evil comes about only because of Haman, we need to look deeper to see the way that the characters in the story, and we ourselves are all responsible for the evil in this world. In Job 14:1 Job admits, “mortals, born of woman are of few days and full of trouble.” He goes on to ask, “who can bring what is pure from the impure?” (Job 14:4).
There is a long running feud between Haman as a Agagite and Mordecai as a Jew (see 1 Samuel 15 for the origins of this feud). This unresolved conflict has become exaggerated. Mordecai acts in unreasonable ways and it leads to a disproportional response on behalf of Haman. We need to consider how our unresolved conflict with others, our long term prejudices and even attitudes that we have inherited allow us to introduce evil into this world.
Xerxes allows evil to occur not through what he does, but through what he doesn't do. In giving his signet ring to Haman and saying "do what you want" he abdicates his responsibility. We need to explore our actions and ask where we're looking the other way and refusing to act when we should be taking a stand for justice, on behalf of the weak and powerless.
Finally, the unnamed court officials who dob on Mordecai for not bowing to Haman introduce evil. There is a blurred line between telling someone something they need to know and telling them something we want them to know. We need to make sure that we're not passing on stories for the sake of our own entertainment, but that we're seeking the best for the person we're speaking to.
Evil is always going to be a reality in this broken world. That's why we wait in this period of Advent for the return of the king who will bring about a new heaven and earth that is free of evil. Until then, as new creations in Jesus Christ, we have the Holy Spirit who leads us to holiness, where we say no to evil and yes to the good of God.
Evil is a part of every one of our lives and is a theme that goes right through the book of Esther. In this section, we see it rear its ugly head in a very real and evident way - the plot of Haman to eradicate the Jewish people. Whilst we might say that this evil comes about only because of Haman, we need to look deeper to see the way that the characters in the story, and we ourselves are all responsible for the evil in this world. In Job 14:1 Job admits, “mortals, born of woman are of few days and full of trouble.” He goes on to ask, “who can bring what is pure from the impure?” (Job 14:4).
There is a long running feud between Haman as a Agagite and Mordecai as a Jew (see 1 Samuel 15 for the origins of this feud). This unresolved conflict has become exaggerated. Mordecai acts in unreasonable ways and it leads to a disproportional response on behalf of Haman. We need to consider how our unresolved conflict with others, our long term prejudices and even attitudes that we have inherited allow us to introduce evil into this world.
Xerxes allows evil to occur not through what he does, but through what he doesn't do. In giving his signet ring to Haman and saying "do what you want" he abdicates his responsibility. We need to explore our actions and ask where we're looking the other way and refusing to act when we should be taking a stand for justice, on behalf of the weak and powerless.
Finally, the unnamed court officials who dob on Mordecai for not bowing to Haman introduce evil. There is a blurred line between telling someone something they need to know and telling them something we want them to know. We need to make sure that we're not passing on stories for the sake of our own entertainment, but that we're seeking the best for the person we're speaking to.
Evil is always going to be a reality in this broken world. That's why we wait in this period of Advent for the return of the king who will bring about a new heaven and earth that is free of evil. Until then, as new creations in Jesus Christ, we have the Holy Spirit who leads us to holiness, where we say no to evil and yes to the good of God.
Monday, November 22, 2010
Expect the Unexpected
Esther 2:1 - 18
One of the sub themes that appears in the book of Esther is that of power and powerlessness. In Xerxes need to find a new queen, we are shown the raw power of the king, that disrupts families, and the powerlessness of girls like Esther to stop him. Despite what appears to a massive power imbalance, by the end of the story, it is Esther who is the powerful one and Xerxes plays to her tune. What brings about this change? The unseen presence of God, who acts in ways that we can never expect.
The theme of power and powerlessness applies to our world today. What are those instances of injustice, and oppression that can leave you feeling despondent and believing that nothing will ever change? When we align with God he is able to work through us and bring about change the upsets the powers of injustice in this world.
One of the sub themes that appears in the book of Esther is that of power and powerlessness. In Xerxes need to find a new queen, we are shown the raw power of the king, that disrupts families, and the powerlessness of girls like Esther to stop him. Despite what appears to a massive power imbalance, by the end of the story, it is Esther who is the powerful one and Xerxes plays to her tune. What brings about this change? The unseen presence of God, who acts in ways that we can never expect.
The theme of power and powerlessness applies to our world today. What are those instances of injustice, and oppression that can leave you feeling despondent and believing that nothing will ever change? When we align with God he is able to work through us and bring about change the upsets the powers of injustice in this world.
Monday, November 15, 2010
The unseen presence of God
Esther 1:1 - 1:22
For a book that sits within the Christian bible, the book of Esther is fairly unusual. Not once is God mentioned, and the characters, both Jewish and non-Jewish sit comfortably in a secular society where God is not named and the people seem to be indifferent to him. Esther therefore has a lot to say to people in 21st century Australia. Both Christian and pre-Christian people, too often see to be unaware and unconnected with God in our daily lives.
The overarching theme of Esther is that this unnamed and apparently unconnected God is active throughout bringing salvation to his people. The marvellous thing about God in this book is that whilst he works to bring about his people, he does it through the invidual actions and choices of the characters. There are no great miracles like in Daniel.
Through the characters in Esther we can learn that God is present in the places where we might never think to look.
Xerxes shows us that God is present in our stupidity - no decision that we make is bad enough that God can't bring his good out of it.
Vashti shows us that God is present in the silence. When we are surrounded by noise, and prefer that God speak to us directly, sometimes we need to still ourselves so that we can find God in the silence.
Mordecai shows us that God uses coincidences. What we may see as unrelated events in our lives, can be drawn together to fulfil God's plan, we need to be willing to act when God prompts.
Esther shows us that God uses our brokenness. We see value in strenght, but God uses our weakness.
Haman shows us that God uses our enemies. We need to ask what we can learn from our enemies and how they can help us grow in grace and as children of God.
For a book that sits within the Christian bible, the book of Esther is fairly unusual. Not once is God mentioned, and the characters, both Jewish and non-Jewish sit comfortably in a secular society where God is not named and the people seem to be indifferent to him. Esther therefore has a lot to say to people in 21st century Australia. Both Christian and pre-Christian people, too often see to be unaware and unconnected with God in our daily lives.
The overarching theme of Esther is that this unnamed and apparently unconnected God is active throughout bringing salvation to his people. The marvellous thing about God in this book is that whilst he works to bring about his people, he does it through the invidual actions and choices of the characters. There are no great miracles like in Daniel.
Through the characters in Esther we can learn that God is present in the places where we might never think to look.
Xerxes shows us that God is present in our stupidity - no decision that we make is bad enough that God can't bring his good out of it.
Vashti shows us that God is present in the silence. When we are surrounded by noise, and prefer that God speak to us directly, sometimes we need to still ourselves so that we can find God in the silence.
Mordecai shows us that God uses coincidences. What we may see as unrelated events in our lives, can be drawn together to fulfil God's plan, we need to be willing to act when God prompts.
Esther shows us that God uses our brokenness. We see value in strenght, but God uses our weakness.
Haman shows us that God uses our enemies. We need to ask what we can learn from our enemies and how they can help us grow in grace and as children of God.
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